Silly Differences in Gender Personalities
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Do Male and Female Personalities Clash?
Defining the Total Dude Personality!
I'm glad I'm a man, of that I am proud.I'm not at all bitchy, annoying and loud.
I won't try to squeeze in jeans three sizes too small.
My credit card is still good when I leave from the mall.
I won't drink Diet Coke, or eat a rice cake.
There's no silicone here, my chest isn't fake.
My face isn't "lifted," my bra isn't stuffed,
I do what's proper, I leave the toilet seat up.
It doesn't take hours to fix up my hair,
I don't see the need to use bathrooms in pairs.
I won't throw a tirade and then blame PMS.
I'm a man and I'm glad I can deal with my stress.
I have intuition, I never get lost.
I share household duties, I won't try to be the boss.
I'm a man and with that comes a high sense of class,
I won't wear a swimsuit that rides up my ass.
I won't cry like a baby when Bambi gets shot
I don't make up false places, like the infamous "G-spot.
" I won't go out at night in a black mini-skirt,
then slap anybody that just tries to flirt.
You crazy women scare me, you have lots of gall,
To make Lorena a hero for hacking off balls.
Yes, I'm pleased to be male and I don't mean to gloat.
I'm sorry you don't understand how to work the remote.
I'll never tease you, or play hard to get.
If I don't get my way, I won't throw a fit.
I don't worry much about breaking a nail,
My face without makeup isn't distorted and pale.
I'll never say one thing while meaning another.
When life gets real hard, I won't run to my mother.
In order to understand just who I am;
You need a Y-chromosome; it's what makes you a man.
Defining the Female Personality
Everyday I give thanks to the Goddess,I have two mounds upon my bodice.
I shave my legs, I sit down to pee.
I can justify any shopping spree.
Not to a barber, but a beauty salon
Can get a massage without a hard on.
Can balance the checkbook, pump my own gas.
Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass.
I always save money by using coupons.
Can admit to others when I am wrong.
Don't drive in circles at any cost,
So I don't have to admit when I am lost.
Don't act like I'm in a timed marathon Every time I go to the john.
Let me tell you men, listen to me boys.
Those things in your pants that you treat as toys.
You love them more then we ever will.
We would rather suck on a cold pickled dill.
I spend two hours preparing for a date,
Only to find you're two hours late.
I don't watch movies with lots of gore.
Don't need instant replay to remember the score.
I won't lose my hair, I don't get jock itch
And just cause I'm assertive, don't call me a bitch.
I don't wear the same underwear everyday.
The food in my fridge has no sign of decay.
I don't go to Sears to look at the tools.
I don't cheat at poker, I follow the rules.
I don't smoke cigars.
Don't pay for drinks at bars.
I don't punch my friends just to say "Hi"
And it's o.k. for me to cry.
I know all you men
Think that you're "IT",
But compared to a woman
You just ain't SHIT!
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Top
Famous People Quotable Love Quotes!
- "Catch a glimps in his eyes, hold it tight, begin to cry. This is it, he's the one, now hold him close and love him tons".
- Katie Hummel
- "Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
Hatred darkens life; love illumines it."
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
- "Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale."
- Gieselle C. Viera
- "When a man has once loved a woman, he will do anything for her except continue to love her. When one is in love, one begins by deceiving oneself and one ends by deceiving others. This is what the world calls a romance"
- Oscar Wilde
- "If you have love in your life it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you don't have it, no matter what else there is, it's not enough."
- Ann Landers
- "The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for."
- Allan K Chalmers
- "Who has not found the heaven below
Will fail of it above.
God's residence is next to min,
His furniture is love."
- Emily Dickinson
- "Love is the whole and more than all."
- E.E. Cummings
- "Love withers with predictability; its very essence is surprise and amazement. To make love a prisoner of the mundane is to take its passion and lose it forever."
- Leo Buscaglia
- "The greatest tragedy of life is not that men perish, but that they cease to love."
- W. Somerset Maugham
- "Love is a fruit in season at all times, and within the reach of every hand."
- Mother Teresa
- "What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
- "The richest love is that which submits to arbitration of time."
-Lawrence Durrell
- "There is no remedy for love but to love more."
-Thoreau
- "Blushing is the color of virtue."
-Diogenes
- "Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that."
- Michael Leunig
- "We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh."
- Agnes Repplier
- "Better never to have met you in my dream than to wake and reach for hands that are not there."
- Otomo No Yakamochi
- They do not love that do not show their love."
- William Shakespeare
- "Love makes the time pass. Time makes love pass."
- French Proverb
- "Mightier far than strength of nerve or sinew, or the sway of magic potent over sun and star, Is Love."
- William Wordsworth
- "The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration."
- Pearl S. Buck
- "Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes and perseveres.
Love never fails."
- Biblical Texts
- "In the eyes of a lover pockmarks are dimples."
- Japanese Proverb
- "Two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one."
- John Keats
- "To live is like to love - all reason is against it and all healthy instinct for it."
- Samuel Butler
- "Life without love is like a tree without blossom and fruit."
- Khalil Gibran
- "So dear I love him that with him,
All deaths I could endure.
Without him, live no life."
- William Shakespeare (Romeo & Juliet)
